Father's Impact on Poverty and Prosperity

[0:00] This is from Ken Taylor's Living Proverbs, and I want to tell you something about that because it is Father's Day, so you probably ought to know this.

[0:12] Ken Taylor was an executive that worked several years ago for Moody Press, which was the publishing arm of Moody Bible Institute in Chicago.

[0:24] And he and his wife were blessed with ten children. And one of his responsibilities was to commute, of course, every day from the suburbs where they lived outside of Chicago into the inner city, because those of you who are familiar with Moody Bible Institute know that it's smack dab downtown.

[0:48] And on the commute, he got interested in writing a paraphrase of the Bible. And the reason he did this was because each evening, as a lot of Christian parents do, he would gather his children around him.

[1:05] And he and his wife would read passages of Scripture, and the kids would read passages of Scripture, and they would spend some time talking about the verses and what they meant, etc. And he was using the revered King James Version, which I happen to be kind of biased toward because it was the translation that was used when I came to faith in Christ, and I guess I cut my teeth on the King James.

[1:32] And it has never been surpassed for its unrivaled beauty of expression, etc. But nonetheless, his children were having a hard time struggling to understand the King James Version with all the V's and V's and V's and everything.

[1:47] So he decided he would just take a little personal project upon himself to write a paraphrase to put what was in the King James Version into an easier-to-understand version and see if that helped the kids and enthused them a little bit more about reading the Bible.

[2:04] So that's what he did. And he started with a few verses, and it grew and grew, and the children were really responding to it.

[2:17] And he said, Dad, this is great. You know, we can understand this. We know what this is about. And he saw how much it was connecting with them. So he took it to one of his superiors where he worked, because their thing is publishing, and he asked if there was any possibility that they might be interested in publishing this as a paraphrase.

[2:37] Now, if you know anything about a paraphrase, that means it is not a precise translation of the Bible, and it does not claim to be. It is a paraphrase. That means the reader takes the words and puts them into his own words, and he kind of rewrites it.

[2:54] Some are very much opposed to that, and some are in favor of it. My position is I'm in favor of it, but you need to understand what it is. It is a paraphrase. It is not a translation.

[3:06] So it should not be accorded the same kind of accuracy and authority that a tedious translation is. Well, his superiors at the Moody Bible Institute said, no, they weren't interested at all in publishing it.

[3:22] They didn't think that it would sell. So not to be deterred, he continued because of his children's sake, and he continued turning out more and more pages of these paraphrases, and the kids continued to love it.

[3:39] So one day he decided that he was going to, at his own expense, come up with a few thousand dollars. Now, a few thousand dollars back in the, what, 70s, 60s or 70s, for a man with 10 kids.

[3:53] A few thousand dollars is a bunch of bucks. Anyway, he and his wife scraped together whatever they could to arrange for a private kind of publication at their own expense.

[4:06] And they had something like just several hundred copies made, or maybe a couple thousand copies made. I don't know. But at any rate, one of those copies made its way across the desk of Billy Graham.

[4:26] He picked it up and read it and thought, this is great. A lot of people who will not read the Bible because they say they can't understand it might read this.

[4:39] And on his next upcoming crusade on television, wherever it was held, millions of people saw it. He offered that little book as a giveaway to everyone who wrote in and supported the Billy Graham ministry in any amount.

[4:57] And, of course, Living Letters was off and running, and it became eventually the Living Bible. And the Moody Bible Institute that didn't want anything to do with it and Moody Press kind of had egg on their face because Ken Taylor went on to found the publishing house Tyndale Press.

[5:17] And it became a giant and still is in Christian publication. So that's what we're reading from today in this paraphrase of Proverbs chapter 4.

[5:30] And I'll read the first verse, and I want you to respond with verse 3. We'll just read every other verse as we go through it. And it is a wonderful, wonderful rendering.

[5:43] Young men, listen to me as you would to your father. Listen and grow wise, for I speak the truth. Don't turn away. For I am too, who is one of the sons, and in the love of my mother, as an only child, and the king of my father.

[6:04] He told me never to forget his words. If you follow them, he said, you will have a long and happy life. Learn to be wise, he said, and develop good judgment and common sense.

[6:18] I cannot overemphasize this point. Cling to wisdom, she will protect you. Love her, she will guard you. Determination to be wise is the first step for becoming wise.

[6:33] And with your wisdom, develop common sense and good judgment. If you exalt wisdom, she will exalt you. Hold her fast, and she will lead you to great honor.

[6:46] She will place a beautiful crown upon your head. My son, listen to me, and do what I say. And you will have a long and good life.

[6:57] I would have you learn this great fact, that a life of doing right is the wisest life there is. If you live that kind of life, you will not live or suffer what you learn.

[7:11] Carry out my instructions. Don't forget them. Don't forget them. Don't forget them. For they will lead you to real living. Don't do that as a way to do. Avoid their haunts.

[7:24] Turn away. Go somewhere else. For evil men will sleep until they've done their evil deed for the day. They can't rest unless they cause someone to stumble and fall.

[7:37] They eat and drink wickedness and violence. But the good man walks along in the ever-brighting light of God's favor.

[7:48] The God gives way to morning slender. While the evil man gropes and stumbles in the dark. Listen to my mind. Do what I say.

[7:59] Listen to your mind. Keep these thoughts ever in mind. Let them penetrate deep within your heart. For they will lead you to real life for you and really help.

[8:13] Above all else, guard your affections. For they influence everything else in your life. Sperm and error and kiss of the cross too.

[8:24] Stay far from her. Look straight ahead. Don't even turn your head to look. Watch your step. Sit through the path and be safe.

[8:35] Don't sidetrack. Pull back your foot from danger. Okay. Thank you for your participation in Proverbs chapter 4 from the Living Proverbs.

[8:51] You are as aware as I am that our nation is in a crisis mode on a number of fronts today.

[9:03] I suppose if you were to ask different people, they would suggest different answers as being the most significant threats that face our nation in this particular day.

[9:19] Some think that the greatest threat is the greatest threat that we face is the health care crisis and Obamacare. Others think it is the ever-expanding role of government and welfarism.

[9:35] Some would describe it as the proliferation of drugs and alcohol. Others are concerned about the immigration debacle and the refusal of our government.

[9:48] The refusal of our government to enforce and protect our own borders. Some would say no, it's the unemployment and the deepening concerns of poverty.

[10:04] Or the threat of radical Islam and its widening influence coupled with our ongoing loss of blood and treasure in Iraq and Afghanistan and other lesser known places.

[10:22] Yet, none of the above compares to the continuing monstrosity that we have become too accustomed to abiding.

[10:37] And that is abortion on demand. I still have to pinch myself from time to time to be able to recall that yes, we really do that thing here in this country.

[10:51] It really is going on. To the tune of nearly 50 million potential Americans whose lives were snuffed out before they were ever born.

[11:07] As gross as these are, and as heinous as these are, and as serious as they are, all of them, none of the above, in my estimation, can be identified as anything more than symptomatic of our greater problem.

[11:29] If all of the above are not the problem, but merely are symptoms of the problem, then the real culprit must indeed be enormous.

[11:44] And it is. Whatever could it be. Some years ago I was asked to speak at a Right to Life conference.

[11:59] And I was asked to speak on the evils of abortion. This was probably in the 1980s. And I agreed to do so. However, I'm sure that I did not completely please the planners of that meeting.

[12:16] Because I made what I thought then was a valid point. And what I am convinced now is even more valid than I was thinking it was then.

[12:28] And that is, abortion is not the problem. It is a symptom of the problem. I want you to think of the problem as being the head of an octopus.

[12:44] Okay? And each of the tentacles that go out from it represent one of the problems. Poverty.

[12:56] Welfarism. Unemployment. Drugs. Lax borders. Home losses.

[13:08] All of the rest of it. Each of those can represent one of the several tentacles that go out from the head. But the head is where the real problem lies.

[13:20] And all of the tentacles, each of which, represent only a symptom. And you could cut off one of the tentacles and you'd still have all the other problems to deal with.

[13:33] So the thing needs to be dealt with at the source. And what is the source? This is going to be a downer for a Father's Day message.

[13:47] Because the source is dad. That's the source. That's the head. That's the source. That's the source.

[13:58] Which all the others portray just symptoms. I would be remiss and sadly less than truthful if all I could muster for you this morning would just be a warm and fuzzy Dad's Day message.

[14:16] Hey, Dad, you're doing a great job. Everybody loves you. Just hang in there and keep up the good work. Well, I can't tell you how grateful I am that there are a number of dads that are doing that.

[14:31] And that is the crumb of kindness that I would like to throw to those of you who are doing that. Hang in there, Dad. You are doing a great job. And if it weren't for the dads who are doing a great job, this nation would have already slipped over the precipice.

[14:49] There are dads who are staying by the stuff and doing a good job. And were it not for this gallant minority of men who are simply being and doing what they are supposed to be and do, our nation would have already gone over the edge.

[15:08] We continue as a nation to dangle at the edge of a very dangerous and unforgiving precipice. One wonders how many more failed fathers will it take to send us over the edge.

[15:35] I envision, let's go from the octopus for a moment to a pyramid. How about an inverted pyramid?

[15:47] Where the small end of the pyramid is at the bottom and it goes up like this. And it's that small size of the bottom that is maintaining and holding up the whole of the mass.

[16:07] But as the mass grows out more and more and up more and more, it puts more and more strain on the small base that is holding it.

[16:22] And it's only a question of time until it topples. That's the way I view the USA right now. And I don't mind telling you.

[16:33] It's a very sad picture. Because like you, I love this country. And I really see it going in the wrong direction.

[16:47] And no, it isn't just because of Obama. Although, he is pushing. But there's a lot more involved than that.

[16:58] Bottom line. Early and up front in this message. So it can generate in your minds throughout the balance of this brief exhortation.

[17:12] And the bottom line is not new. It is very, very old. We are in an increasingly painful sickness of a miserable, malingering, malfeasance of masculinity.

[17:31] How's that for a bunch of M's? You're all familiar with the M&M's, the kind that we like, the delicious little chocolates that won't melt in your hand, only in your mouth.

[17:43] Well, this is M&M&M&M. Miserable, malingering, malfeasance of masculinity. Do I mean to say that the principal reason the nation is in crisis like it is, is simply because the males of America are not doing their job?

[18:11] That's it. That's the message. That's the conclusion. It's the only one I've got. It's the only one I could reach.

[18:24] The males of America are not doing their job. But, as I mentioned earlier, some would protest.

[18:36] But there are lots of men who are doing their job. Yes. And as I've said earlier, if it were not for them, we would already be gone. The problem is, the men who are doing their job are far too few.

[19:00] And America needs a whole lot more than a few good men. We need several million good men.

[19:14] And I don't know exactly how many we have, but we're talking about a population that approximates 300 million people.

[19:25] And approximately half of those are males. So you do the math. The few males there are who are positive contributors with their manhood cannot continue to man up enough to compensate for all those who are not doing their job.

[19:45] America needs a lot more. We need multiplied millions. And a legitimate question is, why is it so many of Americans' potential problem solvers insist on being part of the problem instead of part of the solution?

[20:09] And my answer is, they can't help it.

[20:39] They can't help it. They are what they are. And because they are what they are, they do what they do. And what they do is just coming naturally.

[20:50] And we've got a whole lot of men who are just doing that. But if that's true, then how are those who are doing the job getting it done?

[21:04] And the answer is, they are functioning with an entirely different mindset and value system than those who are part of the problem.

[21:15] They possess a spiritual base that dictates their norms and values, their attitudes and their actions. And they put them into practice.

[21:27] And they are the men who are making the difference. And they are the only thing that is keeping this ship afloat right now. Where did they get those norms and standards, attitudes and actions?

[21:45] What makes these kind of men who and what they are? And the answer, and you know it always comes back to this.

[21:58] I mean, it always comes back to this because this is all there is. It has to always come back to this. These are Christ made men. And they make the difference.

[22:09] They are under a different authority than are the men who think they are their own authority. The bottom, bottom line remains as it has been and continues to be as I have been telling you for the last 40 years.

[22:27] The issue is authority. What you accept as your authority and your right response to it will dictate how you live and carry out your tasks of masculinity.

[22:41] It all depends on what it is you recognize as your authority. The greatest failure of masculinity today. I hope you hear this well.

[22:54] The greatest failure of masculinity today is man's failure to make and sustain a loving relationship with a woman to whom he is married.

[23:11] Not merely living with. And loving relationships with children that may have blessed that union.

[23:23] Our true national crisis is the failure of men to be men. Men as described in scripture. Our national crisis is a crisis of spiritual disregard and disinterest on the part of America's males.

[23:44] Family disintegration is killing us as a nation. Family disintegration is killing us as a nation.

[23:56] Broken, ruptured families strewn all over the country are exacting an incredible toll on this nation.

[24:08] Not only emotionally, relationally, but economically. You've perhaps heard the old saw.

[24:19] Marriage is grand. Divorce is a hundred grand. And it is. And there are few automatic poverty makers that are as efficient in their job as a divorce.

[24:39] How many households? How many households have been reduced to poverty, food stamps, welfare, child support needs, deadbeat dads, insecure kids acting out in rebellion, drugs and suicide, home foreclosures, most of which are stemming from failed man-woman relationships?

[25:06] Think about it. It's epidemic. It's all over everywhere. We all have them in our neighborhood, in our families, in our relatives.

[25:21] We see them all over. They are failed relationships. For whatever reason, people cannot or will not get along. And they break up.

[25:33] The relationship is dissolved. How many lives are ruined by this?

[25:45] How many live-ins are riddled with insecurity and reluctance to commit because of unwillingness to make a manly decision and pop the question?

[25:57] My contention is that a lack of commitment sets the stage for the eventual breakup of the live-ins.

[26:10] Is this just a guy thing? Yep. Primarily it is. It's primarily a guy thing.

[26:21] The live-in relationship is a guy thing. Ladies, would you wake up? Well, what about if the woman?

[26:37] What about if the woman only wants a live-in relationship? Then what do you do? Then you find another woman. Many times.

[26:51] Many times. She says she wants only that. Because she knows that's what he wants to hear. And she doesn't want to lose him. Honey.

[27:04] Lose him. Lose him. If he is not willing to commit to you, hit the road, Jack. Do you have the fortitude to do that?

[27:17] Or are you so insecure and weak? Oh, I can't bear the thought of losing him. Well, you're setting yourself up for a life of real pain.

[27:28] In her heart of hearts. She wants him. But do you know what else she really, really wants?

[27:41] She wants him to want her. And she can never be sure that he really does if he won't come out and say it.

[27:55] Will you marry me? Are there exceptions to what I'm saying? Of course. I'm not painting this with such a broad brush saying that there are no exceptions.

[28:09] Of course there are exceptions. In her mind she wants to know, does he love her deeply enough to ask her to marry him?

[28:22] And the reason I am laying this responsibility on men, the reason that men are the problem, is because men have the initiative.

[28:33] I know there are pushy forward women today who think that they have just as much right to make and set dates as the guy does. And that if he won't call you, you call him.

[28:44] It's perfectly okay. That's balderdash. You've just bought into the junk of this culture. God designed the man to be the initiator.

[28:55] He designed the woman to be the responder. And when you get out of those roles, chaos results. So even though you have been liberated, so-called, that does not mean you are the initiator.

[29:10] Even if you are the one who is more aggressive of the personalities, he has maleness and you don't. And he's supposed to be the originator. Now I know there are plenty of guys out there with no guts and no gumption, and they would forever sit on the dime.

[29:27] And what do you do? If you've got a guy like that, you get a different guy. Let him sit on the line. Move out. Don't let him pull you down with you. Men are the problem because men have the initiative, and they are too selfish or too gutless to take it.

[29:45] Now if you want to talk about a live-in girlfriend, sure. If she's desperate enough and stupid enough to do it, culture has approved of this. The numbers legitimize it.

[29:56] Anytime you get enough people doing something, I don't care what it is, if you get enough people doing it, that will legitimize it in the minds of those who are not thinking.

[30:12] And who's thinking today? We've developed such a herd mentality. All we want to do is be part of the group. We don't want to be different. Dare to be a Daniel was for another day.

[30:24] Today you've got to go along to get along. Whatever the group's doing, whatever you want to be accepted, you want to be well-thought, you do what they're doing. And if they're shacking up and living together without benefit of marriage, fine.

[30:39] And if you decide that you're really not meant for each other, then you just split. There's no messy divorce. There's no expensive lawyers. You don't hassle over this or that. You just go your separate ways.

[30:51] Isn't that cool? As the old saying goes, why buy the cow when you get all the free milk you want? And you know how that translates to men, the free milk?

[31:04] Sex, sex, and sex. That's the name of the game. And if you can have all of that, the benefits of marriage, without the entanglement, after all, what's a piece of paper?

[31:19] Just a piece of paper. You know? So why buy the cow? Failed, fractured, man-woman relationships are the real nemesis of our nation.

[31:38] And so many have bought into this. You know who it's hurt more than anybody? It's the African American community.

[31:50] And our government encourages this. We will pay you so much ahead for every additional baby you have.

[32:05] It doesn't matter that you don't know who the father is. It doesn't matter that you have eight or ten kids and five different fathers. It doesn't matter. After all, we wouldn't want to be judgmental, would we? So, we'll give you X number of dollars a month for every baby you have.

[32:20] And you know what this creates? It just creates what some in government thrive on. That is more and more dependency.

[32:32] More and more looking to the government to meet my needs. To pay my rent and buy my kids milk and put clothes on their backs and all the rest of it.

[32:43] It's somebody else's responsibility. It's not mine. My only responsibility is to just listen to these men who come along and say, yeah, I love you, baby, and make a baby with them.

[32:56] That's my responsibility. And don't tell me this isn't playing out by the zillions across this country. These are your tax dollars at work.

[33:08] work. And there are those in our government who just love it because the people for whom and to whom you provide those benefits, they know who to vote for to keep it coming.

[33:22] And where does this all begin? It begins with uninformed, unprincipled, gutless men who have no idea what it means to be a man.

[33:38] They think you're a man if you can make a baby. If you can have a string of kids across the nation, that makes you a man. Then you're a stud. You're an idiot.

[33:49] That's what you are. You don't have sense enough to know you're an idiot and you're contributing to the nation's problems. Idiot studs. We grow them by the carloads.

[34:02] And they're not all black. There are plenty of white ones too. What's the solution? I've got a good answer and I've got a bad answer.

[34:13] The bad answer is there is no human solution. Forget it. There just isn't. There is no human solution. I don't care what bills Congress passes.

[34:25] There's no human solution. Unfortunately, the only solution there is that works is the one they don't want to hear. And that's a spiritual solution.

[34:37] Man cannot get right with a woman and stay right if he's not right with God. That's where it starts. And the man is the initiator. This does not mean the woman has no responsibility but it does mean that the man has the greater responsibility.

[34:55] God has conditioned masculinity to take the lead. I know this isn't popular but who cares? Look where popularity has gotten us.

[35:07] Look at what doing the popular thing has gotten us. when Ephesians 5 tells us that God has created the man to be the head of the woman that's exactly what it means.

[35:21] He is the principal authority in the home. She is not a second class citizen. She is not inferior to her husband. But she is clearly in the role of loving submission.

[35:34] And if this man loves this woman like he is supposed to she will be able to delight in a submissive spirit to him without a tinge of resentment.

[35:49] She will find in his strong leadership security and safety and peace and she will thrive on it. And it will make her want to be more and more submissive to him.

[36:04] and the more she submits to him the more he loves her in a sacrificial way. And when a husband loves a wife like he is supposed to love her he puts her interests and her needs ahead of his own.

[36:22] That's a sacrificial love. And I don't know that a man in the flesh has the capability of doing that. I know this one didn't.

[36:38] It is only as you draw upon the spiritual energies that God makes available to you through a relationship with Christ that you can really love a woman like you're supposed to love her.

[36:49] And that's the burden of Ephesians 5. So when we get all of this breakdown in masculinity and men not being men like they are supposed to be then you get what we've got.

[37:03] What else can you expect? This is the predictable result. It is men not stepping up to the plate and being men. And again I emphasize because they can't. They can't.

[37:14] It is beyond them. They are what they are and they're doing what they do because they are what they are. And they're just acting out in a way that to them comes naturally.

[37:27] And that is why it always comes back to the subject of authority. We need a supernatural intervention because the only thing that will allow a man to respond with real biblical masculinity is a personal relationship with the God who made him.

[37:46] And even then, even then, that's not a guarantee. Nobody is saying that if a man is a Christian he's automatically going to be the kind of husband. No, we know it doesn't work that way.

[37:57] I know some Christian husbands that are real stinkers. Really tough to get along with. They'd be miserable to live with. But, oh yeah, they know the Lord.

[38:09] But they're walking in the flesh. And Paul says, if you walk in the flesh, you fulfill the desires of the flesh. And the list is given there in Galatians 5.

[38:20] And all the nasty things that the flesh produces, and they can be found in a Christian husband. So the bottom line, the end result is, it's got to be a spiritual solution.

[38:36] And there is no answer that our culture wants to hear less than a spiritual solution. And there is no answer that our Congress and nation's leaders would reject more wholeheartedly than a spiritual solution.

[38:57] And that ought to tell you something right there. Wonderful exceptions there are. Of course there are. Among the blacks I'm thinking of, and I guess I should apologize, we don't call these folks black anymore, do we?

[39:12] I'm living in another day. Now they're African-Americans. So, okay, African-Americans. Among them, you will find the likes of a Mrs.

[39:24] Carson, Ben Carson's mother, but there aren't very many Mrs. Carsons out there. But our hats are off to those few that are.

[39:38] Mrs. Carson was a woman, raised two sons, single mom. I don't know where dad is, or dad was, but he split, make babies, and leave.

[39:50] Ben Carson and his younger brother grew up in the projects, slums and degradation all around them, crime, drugs running rampant, and here was a woman, this rock-solid woman, who was more of a man than the man that made her babies.

[40:17] and she worked two or three jobs, and brought the hammer down on those two teenage boys of hers, and made sure they were in school, and made sure they did their homework, and made sure they got their grades, rather than out running the street with all the rest of the kids.

[40:39] Ben Carson made his way into medical school and graduated with honors, and today, he is a world-renowned pediatric neurosurgeon.

[40:54] Europe brings their hard cases that they are afraid to operate on. They bring them to Ben Carson. He is the head of the neurosurgery department at Johns Hopkins Hospital.

[41:11] So there are some ladies like his mother out there, but there aren't many. Our corrupt government system, let me repeat it, our corrupt government system has created the kind of culture and atmosphere that leads to poverty and dependence.

[41:42] And if you talk to people about that, they get very uncomfortable because they're afraid that their income might be cut off.

[41:54] And that fear, too, is part of what is part of the problem. We created a vicious monster. And you know something? It's virtually all been under the best of intentions of helping people.

[42:12] I'm from the government and I'm here to help you. Those have become feared words among the educated today.

[42:25] Big and bigger government is not our friend. It has contributed to the incredible mess the nation is in today.

[42:37] And I question whether anybody in office, whomever we elect, can back us out of it. Ronald Reagan tried best he could to eliminate a couple of do-nothing agencies when he was the president.

[42:57] He ran into one obstacle after another and finally had to just give it up. Because these government agencies, these bureaucracies, once they are established, they take on a life of their own.

[43:12] And all they do is spawn and grow and increase. and you get what we've got today. So, someone has said, the only problem, the only problem with Congress is that they're made up of people just like us.

[43:34] That's the problem. Man is the problem. And male man in particular. We are the problem.

[43:44] we can be the problem, we can also be the solution. And we know what the solution is. It's a spiritual solution. I'm not finished, but I quit. And I want to open up for some Q&A that you may have.

[43:56] And we've got ample time to do that. So, I discipline myself to quit. That's part of a masculine trait that I've been lacking for a long time. All right, we've got a roving microphone back there.

[44:07] questions or comments, anyone? I can't believe this.

[44:25] Okay, Roger, back there. I would probably disagree a little bit with you putting a lot of blame on the government.

[44:42] I think government encourages the man that's not standing up for what's right, the godly man. So, the government is just a reflection of our society and of our lack of manhood, I think.

[44:58] Well, I wouldn't disagree with that. I wouldn't disagree with that. It's a reciprocating thing. One thing feeds another and it's just, it's, no question about it, it's a complicated mess.

[45:13] It really is. Other comments or questions? Here, I allowed 15 minutes.

[45:23] I thought you people would be chomping at the bit to say something. You know, this may mean to be a long time before you get another Q&A if you're not going to take advantage of it.

[45:34] So, okay, Harleen. Hold on. Do you really want me to ask a question?

[45:50] Well, there's no question that I do. The question is whether Frank wants you to. And he doesn't. What makes you think that all the women are set back so far that they can't take over and run things?

[46:07] what? Okay. Say again. Say again. I said in your speech, you the way you put it, you always had to be a man, not a woman who could run things.

[46:35] No, I didn't say that. Yes, you did, in a way. Did I say that, Frank? I'm not in this. You know what I said about masculine cowards, don't you?

[46:52] No, let me clarify. Nobody is saying, I thought I made it clear that woman is not inferior to man. Oh, when? She is not inferior to man.

[47:03] Someone has said, if a woman is inferior to a man, she is inferior in the same way that a string of pearls is inferior to an iron chain. If you want to call that inferiority, I don't.

[47:18] But women, I'm talking primarily about the marriage relationship. I'm not talking about, I'm not saying that women shouldn't be in charge of a corporation.

[47:31] I was struck by something that Ben-Gurion said. He was the first prime minister of Israel shortly after they became a state in 1948. And there was a woman in his cabinet who later became prime minister.

[47:47] Her name was Golda Mayer. If you've never seen the story of Golda Mayer, and it was played by, who played the part?

[47:57] Marie? Ingrid Bergman played the part of Golda Mayer. and she was one of the most competent prime ministers, I think, that Israel has ever had.

[48:09] But early on in his administration, after Israel was recognized by Harry Truman, in 1948, the United States was the first nation to recognize Israel and welcome them to the national scene.

[48:28] they needed a representative to send to the United Nations because now they were a nation state. And David Ben-Gurion selected Golda Mayer and made her the ambassador to the UN.

[48:48] And later when some of his colleagues were asking him and questioning his judgment about that, why did you choose Golda Mayer to be the representative to the UN?

[49:00] And he shrugged his shoulders and said, she was the best man I have in the cabinet. So I think that speaks of womanhood, and I would concur with that.

[49:14] Women have achieved enormous successes, and there are a whole lot of women who are smarter than the guy they married.

[49:25] I know because I was married to one for almost 50 years. But it doesn't have anything to do with cleverness or smartness or who is the most brilliant or which personality is the most dominant.

[49:38] God established, I'm talking about the marriage relationship. God established the male to be the head of the marriage. And I know there are a lot of women who are more competent than their husband.

[49:52] That's not the issue. There are a lot of women who are more creative and more responsible than their husbands. That's not the issue. The issue is one primogenitor. And I'd be the first to admit God could have just as easily made it the other way around.

[50:06] He could have just as easily created Eve first. In fact, that seems to be even more reasonable, even more logical, to create Eve and then take man from the woman.

[50:20] man. Because that's the way it works today, isn't it? There is not a man anywhere who's been taken from a man. All men are taken from women.

[50:31] But the very first one was a woman taken from man. And God just reversed that. So he could have started with the woman first, but he started with the man.

[50:43] And he didn't say, Adam, I've given you extra intelligence that the woman will never have. Therefore, I'm making you the head. He didn't say that.

[50:54] And he didn't mean that. But in every relationship, somebody has to be in charge. And I've often counseled married couples and couples to be.

[51:06] Okay, so you've got this situation. You've got an important decision to make. And he wants to do A, and you want to do B.

[51:16] B. How are you going to resolve that? Who wins? You know, what usually happens, it's the one with the dominant personality wins, or the one who is the most articulate wins, and the other one just kind of throws up their hands and says, I give up, I give up.

[51:36] I grew up in a situation like that. My parents, God love them. My mom and my dad, I owe them so much I could never begin to tell you.

[51:49] They were wonderful parents to me. But you know, my mom was the dominant personality. And my dad, stepdad, very easy going, very laid back, she could just ride rough shot over him.

[52:05] And she did. I mean, she could formulate an argument and shoot him down like a machine gun while he's still going, uh, uh, uh, because she's working both sides of her brain at once and he's laboring to work one side, you know, and, and she wore the pants.

[52:22] She ruled the roost. But you know something? She resented him for letting her do it. And one day, dad and I were out in the garage tinkering around and they'd had an argument about something, you know, like couples do all the time.

[52:37] And I was about 15 years old and I said, dad, why don't you stand up to her? Why don't you, why don't you tell her, no, we're not going to do that.

[52:49] And he says, well, I've done that, I've done that a few times, but it just wasn't worth it.

[53:02] She always had ways of making me pay, you know, it just wasn't worth it. So I just, okay, give in, whatever you, you know, and then she turned right around and resent him for letting her do that.

[53:15] And this happens in a lot of marriages because there are a lot of marriages where the woman is the dominant personality. She's more aggressive, she's more on it, and he's trying to, you know, find out what's going on, and she's already been around the barn three times, and he doesn't have a clue.

[53:36] So there are a lot of husbands that are no match for their wife, and the wife, if the wife, if the wife is not dedicated to the Lord, she will take advantage of that and use it to her own end.

[53:50] And if she is dedicated to the Lord, she will recognize that she has that power, but she restrains herself from using it because she doesn't want to wear the pants.

[54:03] peculiarities and dynamics of human relationships, and they are, they call them dynamics because they're dynamite, I guess.

[54:15] Well, we've got three minutes left if anybody's got a comment. Ron, up here, Ron Gannon has a comment or question. One of the indicators of a broken society is that large numbers of prisons, jail facilities, I've gone to talk to a lot of men in prison and I've never heard one of them say anything against their mother.

[54:42] Isn't that something? There's a lot of resentment against dads though. The resentment against fathers is tremendous. Yeah. And Ron can speak from experience because he's been engaged in prison ministry for several years and he's talked with hundreds and hundreds of convicts and you know when you talk to these people you go to a prison and you know they all have a commissary where the inmates can accumulate a certain amount of money in their account and they can go to the commissary and buy things with real money.

[55:20] They get it to their account and one of the big big sellers every year is Mother's Day cards. They sell them out the wazoo, Mother's Day cards.

[55:35] Father's Day cards, they don't hardly even have to stock them. them. And what does that tell you?

[55:46] That just reinforces what we've been saying. There are a lot of absentee dads and there are a lot of dads that even when they're home, they're not home.

[55:57] They're not available to their kids. If mothers characterize anything, in my estimation, the best synonyms for mothers is available.

[56:12] A mother is available. She's a nurturer. And a father is supposed to be competent, capable, dependable.

[56:29] he's supposed to treat his wife in such a way that when their kids look on, they are stabilized and strengthened by the bond that exists between mom and dad.

[56:42] And it gives the kids a feeling of security and stability. And there are so many relationships that don't have that.

[56:53] It's just tragic what parents put their kids through. Just tragic. Well, our time was gone. This has been a heavy message.

[57:05] But I am completely convinced with every fiber of my being that what I have said is so, and I would not care to retract one word of it.

[57:24] Can we stand, please? Father, along with the requirements for biblical masculinity, you have also provided the wherewithal that that can be realized.

[57:39] And it's all right here in your word. Ephesians 5 alone would be enough to settle it for anybody who is really serious. Thank you for the fathers that we have who are really hitting the ball day in and day out, nurturing their children, being a positive role model for them, supporting them, sustaining them, encouraging them.

[58:01] Oh, God, may their tribe increase. We so desperately need many more men like that. We're so thankful for those we have.

[58:13] Our hearts go out to those who know nothing of what we've been speaking because life is so short and yet has so much to offer for those who are in line with what you've laid out, that we just weep for them because we who have loving relationships know something about what they are missing and it's tragic.

[58:39] Father, if there is any way further or any way more that we as an individual or as a church can be in that fray to help make a difference, we want to place ourselves at your complete disposal for it.

[58:56] And we look to you for any revelation of that in Christ's name. Amen.